Playoff Male Bag

This will be the shortest (and probably the last for this season) Male Bag because A) I don't have a ton of time 2) You all didn't ask a ton of questions and D) I'll be posting way more often in the playoffs. With it being a Playoff Male Bag, I tried my best to stay on topic. Here goes:

You should have saved the HR blog for October. It's obvious that all of the Phillies are now reading the blog and working hard to hold up to your high expectations.

Because of this, I will do my best to speak only in positives. Luckily, the Phillies don't give me many negatives to mention.
(See? Doing it already!)

Does this 6-game (maybe more) losing streak worry you? If so, how much? Sure we are resting guys and playing our nubs but come on.

Did it worry me? Sure, a little, because losing is losing. No matter who is playing, there's no way they go out there and don't care about winning. Every guy, whether it be Roy Halladay or Brandon Moss, was playing his very hardest when he was on the field. They are professional athletes, and that's what they do. This is one reason that I hate when people describe athletes as "competitive." "Oh man, this guy's a real competitor." "He's got a competitive streak in him!" DUH! I guarantee you every one of those guys was super annoying when growing up because of how competitive they were. You always wanted to be on their team - not because they were good, but because it was way too annoying to be on the other team and get killed by them. Have I talked about this before? Oh well. The point is: Everyone except Jose Reyes cares about winning. So not winning is scary because everyone wants to. Clinching a playoff berth does not change that. It worried me in that way.
It did not worry me, though, in the sense that these really were our "nubs" playing. As I've pointed out before, we didn't play a single game during what ended up being an 8-game losing streak with our regular lineup. All we needed was to get them back into a rhythm or routine, playing every day in the same spot in the lineup and same spot in the field. I knew once that would happen that we'd stop being so majokey.

Do the Fightin's still have HK's sports coat and white kicks in the dugout?

I'm not really sure about that. I think they do; I feel like I remember seeing it at some point this year. I don't know though. I'm not even sure how to go about researching that. Does anyone else know? If you do, please share. If they don't, I think they at least need to bring it back for the playoffs. Harry should be a part of every Phillies playoff run. Also, we should lynch Christopher Wheeler*.

You worried about a potential Cardinals matchup?

Of course I am. I'd be worried about any team that we have to face. We haven't exactly shut down any of the teams that were involved with the playoff race other than the Braves. And the Braves suck too bad to make the playoffs. The Brewers are a good team, and our taking of 3 out of 4 games in Milwaukee shouldn't fool anyone into thinking we'd easily sweep them in a series. The Diamondbags split the season series with us, and they are just kind of annoying to have around. The Cardinals, though? Well, they are the team we have the most reason to worry about. We went 3-6 against them. Their starters had a 1.15 ERA against us, pitching an average of 7 innings per game. Meanwhile, our starters went just 2-4 against them. Not that they pitched poorly (2.88 ERA), we just had trouble getting them support. Ryan Howard, who kills St. Louis historically, hit just .222 against them this season. Plus, Raul Ibanez sucks even worse against them (believe it or not, it's possible). He hit .083 against them, and he played left field, so that means his defense was horrible.
I'm definitely worried about the matchup in some way, but, despite all of those numbers, I wouldn't say I'm any more worried than I would be if it were any other team. It's the playoffs! We don't play the Cubs, Astros, and Padres anymore. We play the good teams. We play the teams that deserve to be here. And we have proven throughout the season that we deserve it more than any of them. Now we just need to prove it.

Why are you shaving your current beard to start a new one?

I looked up the rules to Playoff Bearding. I used a few different sets, so I can't really give you a link, but I'll give you MY rules that I have come up with that seem to be a general consensus:
1. Must be clean shaven at the beginning of the playoffs. Shave as close to game time as reasonably possible without extending into the start of the actual game.
2. No length may be taken off of the actual beard, however you choose to grow it. It does not necessarily need to be a full beard, but you need to know what you're doing and stick to it throughout.
3. You may shape up and shave around the beard, but this can only occur after your team loses a game.
4. Once your team is eliminated from the playoffs, the beard must be shaved clean again. If you do not do this, it's complete disrespect to the Playoff Beard as well as your team, essentially claiming that you were growing a beard "just because." Get a job.
5. If your team wins it all, there is no requirement after that. Do with your beard as you wish. (This is where the "Hair Timeout" that I want to invent would come in handy. At any point in your life, you can call a "Hair Timeout," and your hair will look like that for as long as you have the timeout going. It's obviously impossible to invent, but boy wouldn't that be great? A good hair day could last forever! In this case, you'd be able to keep your beard at whatever length it was at when your team won. What could be sweeter?)

They'll win right? Should I be worried about how much losing they've been doing lately?

Yes, they'll win. I think we have the right combination of indescribable talent in our pitching staff, "This-Might-Be-Our-Last-Chance" desire in guys like Rollins, Howard, and Utley, and "HolyCrapThisIsAwesomeLetsPlayReallyHardJustSoWeCanKeepPlaying" in Hunter Pence. He's insane. Like I said earlier, don't get too worked up about the losing. I don't even remember it. That last series with the Braves was exactly what we needed. A series that felt real because it was for the Braves, and we showed that we'll just snap your hopes and dreams in half if we feel like it. Because we're that good and we want this that much.

Can't wait until he does that in October #Raoops

(I may have to completely abandon my positive attitude for this one) This tweet came after a strikeout with the bases loaded in Wednesday night's game. As I've said countless times this year (but really not countless...you could probably count them), Raul will be the death of us in October (if there is one) because of the pattern he's gone through of good month-bad month this season. September was his "good" month, and he hit .258 with 3 homers. Can we please not wait around to see what the bad month will be? Can we just make the adjustment and put Mayberry in left to begin the playoffs? Our first game will be against a lefty, so it's an adjustment that makes sense for the hand-happy Uncle Chuck, and it gives us better defense when it matters the most (October). Ibanez sucks. Raul Ibanez sucks. He is terrible. The thought of him swinging and leaving his shoes at home plate makes me sick to my stomach. Picturing him sliding in the outfield to attempt to trap a ball with his glove that hops over his head for a triple keeps me up at night. PLEASE DON'T LET HIM PLAY! DO NOT LET HIM BLOW THIS FOR US! DON'T DO THIS TO ME!!!

The best thing about the playoffs, no more [Christopher Wheeler]

And the worst thing? Much more Joseph Buck. Ohhhh man. Did I just establish that Joseph Buck and Timothy McCarver are undeserving of nicknames as well? I think I did. Get ready for some serious commentator complaining (I feel like I should be able to combine those 2 words to trademark a new term) during this playoff run.

Are you nervous?

I don't get nerves...I give 'em.

*If this blog has gotten to the point where people actually read it (it hasn't), it should be noted that this is a total joke. I don't actually want to lynch Christopher Wheeler (yes I do**).

**Once again, total joke***

***Not really

UH OH!!! Influx of questions at the last minute! You can dry those eyes and put away those tissues. Here's more MALE BAG!!!

What are your thoughts on the ESPN article regarding playoff clinching celebrations? I mean are they excessive? Does the abundance of alcohol send a bad message? Did the writer go out of bounds by playing the Adenhart card?

I didn't see this article, and it shocks and depresses me that I was unable to find it, considering that the internet still exists as I type this. But I get the gist of what it is saying from this question, and I have to agree and disagree with said article. The celebrations sure are excessive. I don't think that any of the Phillies would have told you that they were happy with "just" making the playoffs this season. So why celebrate that much? We still have work to do. On the other hand, it's nice to have a chance to let loose and look at those things in a certain perspective. Making the playoffs is a big deal to the teams who didn't make it. And it's certainly a big deal to the Cardinals and Rays this season. When I talk about goals with my students, I actually plan on making a similar comparison (because I've learned that EVERYTHING can be related to sports). If you have a baseball team, what is the goal for the end of the season? Winning the World Series. Ok, so how do you do that? Get to the World Series. How do you do that? Win the LCS. What do you have to do to accomplish that? Win the LDS. What about to get there? Make the playoffs... and so forth. It shows that today truly matters in where you are 1 week, 1 month, 1 year, 10 years from now. Not that every day's goal (win the game) or weekend's goal (win the series) or month's goal (have a winning record) will be grounds for a huge celebration, but it is good to set up a series of rewards for yourself. Oh man. I really am a teacher.
As for the alcohol aspect, I don't know how I feel about it. I always picture it as more of a champagne thing than a beer thing. I think the beer makes it sort of common. It's cool for the Phillies just because it's Philadelphia and there's some symbolism there, but I think that, for the most part, celebrations should be a little classier. Speaking of, I need to go out and get a few bottles of Andre to save up for the World Series victory. (And save them I will do. One thing that I don't like to do as a fan is celebrate before we're finished. I don't buy NL East Champions gear, and I will never again pop champagne before a World Series win (2009...ugh). Fans should hold out because we're not putting in the work that the players are. Player celebrations are justifiable; ours are not. Act like you've been there, and save it for the final victory. If we don't win the World Series, those bottles of champagne will taste even better after next year's championship)
Oh and the Adenhart thing seems unnecessary. Completely unrelated in my opinion. Why bring up those types of things in negative way at such a joyful time?

Feelings on seeing Jimmy in another uniform next year potentially? Will he be playing for a Phillies victory? Or for a great offer from his next team? Or is it both?

It'll be weird with him in another uniform, and I'm afraid it'll happen. I think he wants more money/years than we'll give him, and that makes me sad. The guy's done everything, and we could use that leadership, especially when Freddy Galvis finally gets called up for some utility work. He should have a chance to get mentored by Jimmy before just being thrust into a starting spot. And I certainly don't want some other big name guy playing there. If Jose Reyes is ever in a Phillies uniform, I will stop watching.
As for what he's playing for, I truly believe he's all Phillies right now. He sure does love himself, but he does it in a way that always benefits the team. Is there something in the back of his mind thinking about his next contract? Actually, I don't think so. Until some majoke of a reporter asks him about it, and then I hope he'll be too pissed and offended at the question to start that thinking. We shall see. I do think that it matters, though. Playing for the team is so much bigger than playing for yourself, and I think it keeps you looser. You know other people have your back as you have theirs. If he puts it on himself and is only playing for Jimmy, we're all in trouble.

Which of our favorite players do you think play for the fans, and who clearly doesn't? Does it matter?

I will first say that it doesn't matter. Like I just said, I think playing for your team is the most important, and I think everyone on the Phillies is doing that. With that being said, here's how I would break it down, player-by-player.
Halladay - He's all business. He loves the fans, but doesn't need them to perform
Lee - loves our fans. It's why he came back, and he definitely plays for them
Hamels - has started to play much more for the team since Halladay got here. Before that, I would've said he's all about himself
Oswalt - team
Madson - bullpen. Those bullpen guys love each other
Lidge - fans. He wants to impress and please Phillies fans and gain the trust back that he had in 2008
Bastardo - more bullpen. I feel like he doesn't talk to anyone else
Stutes - team
Worley - fans. He's pretty active on Twitter, so that tells me he wants fan approval
Kendrick - team
Blanton - team
Ruiz - team
Schneider - hopefully won't play, so it shouldn't matter. But team
Howard - mixes some fans in there when things are going well, but he only gets upset about letting the team down when things are tough, not the fans. That's a good thing
Utley - Chase Utley is perfect
Polanco - team
Rollins - mixes in the fans. Leaving us will be the toughest part if he goes
Valdez - team
Martinez - team
Ibanez - trying to slowly kill me
Victorino - fans. Ever get the feeling that he's that one friend who is funny but really just needs to shut up sometimes because he's trying too hard? Did typing that sentence just make me realize way too much about myself? Crap.
Pence - fans. New guys always love being appreciated in Philly
Mayberry - team
Francisco - who?
Gload - team

How bad are all of the new sitcoms in the new fall line up, seriously?

Well my sister is freakin' obsessed with Up All Night, and that's decently funny, except they're totally using Will Arnett in the wrong way! Will Arnett is a smartass and a jerk. That's how he's funny. Hot Rod anyone? But they are making him about to be an awkward and uncomfortable new father? Who is this benefitting?
The New Girl is getting all kinds of positive comments from guys my age everywhere, but Zooey Deschanel doesn't really do it for me as much as she does everyone else. I know I'll get a lot of crap for saying that, but isn't she just an artsy Katy Perry? Sure, I like her, but I'm not crazy about her. Sorry, Cheese.
Other than that, I haven't taken a look at too many new ones. We currently have 6 1/2 hours of television recording on Monday nights, 3 hours on Tuesdays, 2 1/2 hours on Wednesdays, and 3 hours on Thursdays. That's a lot to keep up with. I'm handling it (with ease), but it's still a lot. (15 hours of TV? Cripes. What is wrong with us? I would've hoped it would be way more than that!)

(Seriously. It's DVR. Why WOULDN'T you record stuff? Don't judge me. You're just jealous because you're still be restricted by juvenile television schedules. I laugh at your depression)

Are you really going to keep the blog going through October? Do you realize you have practically already met your goal for this season (blog franchise record?) even through a move and natural disasters?

Oh we're goin' there! I realized with almost every post in August and September that I've become a much better person over the past 2 years (Ladies, check out my commitment skills ;) Eh? Eh?). I realize that we've achieved a franchise record, but let's also look at the stats. Since the end of 2008, any time I stop doing a blog at any point while the Phillies are still playing, we lose. We have never lost a World Series in which I've kept a blog going throughout. Not having played in one in that situation is irrelevant.
As for the move and natural disaster stuff? Well, if you can define the word "aweso," then I guess you don't really need me. But if not, I'll be here all month.