Say Cheese

(First let me say that I hate the title of this post, but it was the catchiest thing I could think of that had "cheese" in it. Perhaps its fitting and extra frustrating that the word "cheesy" is the only word to describe this.)

I'm sure many of you remember my old roommate from Penn State who has always been affectionately referred to as "Cheese" on this blog (as well as by me essentially since we've known each other and by anyone who knows him through me). It was a goal when I started this blog to turn him into a die-hard Phillies fan, a goal that has fallen by the wayside over the past 2 years.

This weekend, however, I was able to make the trek out to the lovely Pennsylvania metropolis known as Mechanicsburg. Although you know Mechanicsburg as the site of Jubilee Day, the home of the "wrench drop" every New Year's Eve, or perhaps Bret Michaels' home town, to me Mechanicsburg is mostly known for its main export: Cheese (ugh...sorry about that everyone). As one of my best friends for the past few years, the only area of our lives that Cheese and I did not fully connect from the beginning was sports, among other things (no, that doesn't make sense). Things have changed over the years, though.

Cheese came to Penn State not really caring that much about football. I, on the other hand, was all about the sport that makes State College Pennsylvania's third largest city on Saturdays in the fall.
During March Madness every year, you could find me hooking up as many TVs and computers as necessary to catch every second of every game. Cheese's favorite parts were the commercials reminding us of some upcoming golf tournament that no one would shut up about (Masters? Something like that? Who cares?)
I could not get enough of the Phillies. Cheese simply went along for the ride whenever the team was looking good.

Since then, I have wisened up to the stupidity of the game of football and the blindness with which Penn Staters will follow their team, no matter how many players have been caught committing various criminal acts. At Cheese's house this weekend, I actually watched a good amount of the Masters, even going so far as to continue to watch once I got home (and apparently appearing to be some type of expert. I don't know where Adam Scott is from. No, I couldn't tell you how many people are tied for the lead right now. How should I know how a playoff system works in golf, Mom?)
And perhaps most important of all, Cheese has totally immersed himself in the Philadelphia Phillies. One of the first things I noticed after our tears of pure, unadulterated bliss cleared up upon first seeing each other was the background of his iPhone being a Phillies "P". He asked if I had heard what was going on in the game, and, although I had been listening on the radio, he was able to give me an accurate play-by-play of anything important that had happened on my way. Despite his love for the Masters, we used Saturday and Sunday afternoon to focus on the Phillies, only flipping to watch a little golf during the short commercial breaks between half-innings. A few more Cheese Phillies stats for you:

-Cheese has paid somewhere around $15 for an app that allows him to follow the Phillies on his phone while at work
-He searches day and night for a new Phillies hat (a fitted one that's not a flat brim and looks just like what the players wear. Preferably with a red little button on top, not blue. If you can find one of these, let one of us know)
-He likes Raul Ibanez (I don't know if this makes him a really good fan or a really ignorant fan)
-Cheese has been known to text me after exciting Phillies games or even after exciting events within Phillies games

Perhaps the most exciting of all of this, though, is something he told me this weekend. When discussing people who are bandwagon fans, it was suggested that he could possibly be a bandwagon fan himself. He informed me that "I don't follow the Phillies because they won the World Series, though. I started following them more because of you." Reflecting on this statement and actually typing it out makes it seem a lot less heterosexual than it was initially, but I am not all that concerned, and I would like to think that he isn't either.

Because of all this, the Braves series this weekend may have been one of my favorites of the season no matter what the result. Lucky for my peace of mind, though, we ended up taking 2 of 3 in beautiful fashion. Friday night was rough, but Saturday was a great display of our catchers' offensive firepower, and Sunday was a brilliant bounce back by Cole.

Positives of the series:
-Our offense is unreal. Every one of our regulars is hitting above .300 except Ibanez (.257). (Side note: I personally can't really stand Ibanez as a player anymore, and I plan on proving throughout this season that he, along with NASA and the city of Pittsburgh, can be blamed for every problem that arises for the Phillies, possibly the country, possibly the entire world)
-Hamels is OK. I told you he would be.
-Our bullpen put together what felt like a real save. There haven't been too many close ones this season, but we got close to a bind at the end of the game and were able to conserve the shutout
-Scott Franzke and Larry Anderson are pure poetry. I loved listening to them both Friday night and today while travelling. I feel like I'm really good friends with them when I listen. Like they are constantly telling an inside joke that I'm a part of.
-We are controlling the NL East up to this point in the season. It's early, but first place always feels nice

Negatives:
-There aren't really many, but I would be more concerned about Cliff's outing on Friday night than most people were about Cole's on Tuesday. Cliff was getting hit hard all over the park. I am not actually worried about this because he's Cliff Lee, but it was not fun to listen to him getting abused like that
-Thomas McCarthy and Christopher Wheeler are a pure train wreck. I hate listening to them all the time while watching on TV. I feel like I want to strangle them when I watch. Like they are constantly just making up jokes that neither one of them gets and neither do I.

Overall, this was an excellent series and a good way to head into what should be another series win against Washington.

Braves Preview

As I mentioned in my last post, the Phillies numbers have been quite the opposite of what we expected this season, with our hitters hitting and our pitchers struggling (according to the numbers, that is). The Braves have been having the opposite experience thus far. Their pitchers have been on, and their hitters have been underperforming somewhat.

Brian McCann has been great so far, hitting .423 in their first 7 games. He has yet to record an extra-base hit, but I'm sure we can count on several of them against the Phils this weekend. Is it just me, or does he seem to kill us every time we play them? He has eaten up Hamels and Blanton in the past, as well as Myers when he was around. Lucky for us, he will only possibly face 1 of those pitchers in the next 3 days.

Aside from McCann, though, the Braves have yet to get going. He is the only regular hitting over .250 other than Chipper Jones. And Chipper is probably only hitting .320 because he can never hear the umpire call him out, and then everyone feels bad for him because they don't make baseball uniforms in the form of cardigan sweaters and because it takes him so long to get to and from the stadium every day (Because he's a slow driver. These are jokes about his old age. Try to keep up here).

The pitching, though, has been much more impressive. Here's a look at our matchups.

Game 1: Cliff Lee (1-0, 3.86 ERA) vs. Tim Hudson (1-0, 1.29 ERA)
This should be quite the pitcher's duel. We all know how great Lee can be, and Hudson is capable of being right up there with him. The advantage we have is Ryan Howard. I guess he's been all right so far this season (.480, 2 HR, 8 RBI), and he has very good career numbers against Hudson (.341, 6 HR, 12 RBI in 41 AB). I think we end up taking this game something like 4-1 on a couple Howard home runs.

Game 2: Roy Oswalt (1-0, 3.00 ERA) vs. Brandon Beachy (0-0, 1.50 ERA)
Beachy is making his 5th career start and his 3rd against the Phillies. Although he was fine against us last season, the Phillies generally don't treat pitchers well that they've seen a bunch of times unless they are elite. An elite pitcher would not be named Beachy. That's just dumb. Phils win 6-2

Game 3: Cole Hamels (0-1, 20.25 ERA) vs. Derek Lowe (1-1, 0.77 ERA)
This game all comes down to whether or not Derek Lowe's sinker is working for him, or if the Braves can be smart about getting him out of the game before he goes too far. He generally dominates us for the first 6-7 innings, but we can usually get to him after that as his pitch count increases and his sinker starts to get elevated (at least that's what analysts say happens to it, I know nothing about pitches to be honest). I don't think Hamels struggles in the same way in this game, and it should be a pretty good pitcher's duel again. Unfortunately, I think it's too tough to sweep the Braves in Atlanta. Prediction: 4-3 loss

Something I love about this series is that the Braves have avoided Roy Halladay, yet still managed to face 3 potential Cy Young winners. And we can look forward to this all season. I am still so excited about our starting rotation. Every series this season, teams will only get possibly 1 game off from those 4 guys. That means we should be at an advantage to win every series this season. Every. Single. Series. Say whaaaaattt??!!

So Backwoods

In no way am I condoning the act of smoking cigars. This is a family friendly, drug-free blog. But from people I've talked to who have smoked cigars, apparently a small bag filled with 8 frayed brown sticks that leave paper traces all through your mouth for the small price of 4.99 is a sight of pure joy. There's nothing quite like that sweet aromatic taste in your mouth, especially the night of and morning after when you need to brush your teeth for 4-5 minutes to feel slightly normal again. Or at least that's what I hear.

For all the men out there: You know what I'm talking about.
For all the women: Ugh. So gross. Am I right?!

Either way, these cigars are so ghetto looking that people have been known to put them in their mouths backwards. So, smoke a Backwoods backwards. After something like this, the term "backwoods" naturally becomes synonymous with "backwards." And all of a sudden anything that's grossly unexpected could be described as "backwoods."

If you go back and read my season preview, you will see that this season should have been filled with 2-1 and 3-0 wins for the Phillies. Our pitching is what will get us to the promised land - let's just hope our hitting can keep up.

Well, so far, this season has been so backwoods. Take a look at these stats after 6 games:

ERA - 4.80 (22nd in baseball)
Runs scored - 32 (6th in baseball)
Batting average against - .272 (24th in baseball)
Batting average - .337 (2nd in baseball)

If you told me those were going to be our numbers, I would guess that it was 2002 and Robert Person was starting every game for us (Note: although Person pitched well in that game, he sucked the rest of the season).

It's been a pretty backwoods year for a lot of teams around the league. The AL-favorite Red Sox are 0-6. So are the Rays. Elsewhere in the AL East, the Orioles are 4-1 and in first place going into tonight's game. The Pirates just beat the Cardinals in a series in St. Louis (which one of my best friends has been writing an awesome blog about that you should check out). The Giants also can't seem to get on track, starting this season 2-4. Talk about backwoods.

And perhaps most backwoods of all has been everyone's overreaction to Cole's rough outing Tuesday night. I feel like everyone has jumped all over him and assumed that he can't handle his spot as the 4th starter in our rotation. "Hamels better get his act together or we'll be in trouble!"..."I've always hated him"...and worst of all "He had too many games like this last season, too"

Are you insane?! He had a 3.06 ERA last season, and his 12-11 record did not at all show what he could have done with any type of support. And if you look at that horrifyingly long and painful 3rd inning, the reason it was so horrifyingly long and painful was because of singles, singles, and more singles. I would rather see Cole get beat by a bloop to left-center and a ball getting between Polanco and Rollins than see people like Angel Pagan belting doubles off the wall and Scott Hairston smacking home runs off the Budweiser sign with Cole out on the mound. There is no need to worry about this at all. If there's anything to worry about, it's losing a 7-run lead. Although I don't expect perfection from our pitchers, and certainly not from Joe Blanton, I definitely expect a lead of 4-5 runs or more to be more than safe.

Overall, it ended up being a fun series after a shaky first 3 innings of it. After just 1 run in game 1, we bounced back big time in games 2 and 3, a good way to head into an important early-season series in Atlanta. Look for the preview tomorrow. Remember, do not hesitate to shoot me an email with any questions, comments, or random anything about the Phillies or life in general. (Shoot me an email. Hilarious)

Mets Preview

Coming up for the Phillies: the 3 most meaningful games against the Mets we will play this season. They are only 1 game behind us! This can only last so long.
Coming up for the Mets: the 3 most meaningful games they will play this season

Although this may sound a bit cocky, it is largely true. The Mets do not really have a prayer of competing in the NL East this season. In the past, they've at least been able to compete even though we all knew they couldn't win it (how adorable). This season...not so much. So here's a breakdown of the pitching matchups and how I think this will all pan out:

Game 1: Chris Young (0-0, 0.00 ERA) vs. Cole Hamels (0-0, 0.00 ERA)
Both pitchers will be making their first start of the season, and this is the only game in which we can say that for the series. Cole Hamels seems to love playing the Mets, but the offense doesn't love hitting when he does. He had 2 straight 1-0 losses to the Mets last season, and he compiled an 0-4 record against them in 4 starts with a 2.27 ERA. In those 4 games, our offense scored 3 runs total. Facing Chris Young is scary because he's 6'10". He has had some success in the big leagues but has struggled to stay healthy for a full season. I think we don't have a problem getting to him early and often and Hamels gets an easy win.

Game 2: Mike Pelfrey (0-1, 10.38 ERA) vs. Joe Blanton (0-0, 0.00 ERA)
This game interests me because of the Mets' choice for starting pitcher. Pelfrey is their "ace" right now (hilarious), and he would normally be slated to pitch against Roy Halladay on Thursday. However, they are taking the rest over the rotation here and putting him against our 5th starter. They have 2 options:
1) Put their best against our worst and hope to get one win out of this series, conceding the Halladay start
2) Put their worst against our worst and Pelfrey against Halladay, showing they have any type of confidence in their team against the reigning NL Cy Young winner.
They have chosen to wuss out here by taking the former and giving themselves a "guaranteed" win with this matchup. I hope someone tells Joe Blanton what they are doing here so he can absolutely crush them. And I think that happens. (Plus I am definitely picking the Phils to win until they lose)
Side note: Is this something that teams will do as often as they can against us? Will they just totally give up on their team as often as possible just to get 1 win in a 3-game series? It will be interesting to see how often teams with this same option will do the same thing. Show confidence or try to win. Tough call
Another side note: If you have no idea what I'm talking about, any baseball team would normally (for the most part) have a 5-man rotation even with off-days in between series'. So the Mets should start their 5th starter on Wednesday and have Pelfrey go against Halladay on Thursday. But because of the off-day, they can start him on Wednesday and it will be just as if they never had an off-day - he will get the same amount of rest.

Game 3: Jonathon Niese (0-0, 2.57 ERA) vs. Roy Halladay (0-0, 1.50 ERA)
Halladay's pitching, and we will have played too many games at this point in the season without him getting a win. He'll win for that reason as well as the fact that Jonathon Niese spells his first name like an idiot.

This is a fun series to look forward. We'll get to embarrass Mets fans even more than they already are by just being Mets fans. After this, we can head down to Atlanta with a nice 6-0 record, on our way to the first undefeated record in baseball history.

An Offensive Statement

Coming into this season and this series, there was no doubt that our pitchers would dominate. The hope was that our offense could keep up. The season-opening sweep against the Astros showed us something slightly different.
Game 1:
Roy Halladay did essentially what was expected of him, aside from the fact that he only pitched 6 innings. And the offense did what I expected of them, providing him with zero run support. With expectations nationally as high as they are, I was all too quick to basically give up on the Phillies in game 1 of the 2011 season. Heading into the 7th, and even into the 9th, I figured we could start worrying about winning the series, let alone sweeping it. Then we saw something that the Phillies don't normally show us: small ball. After 8 innings of barely knowing what a hit was, six singles and 3 runs later gets the Phillies their first win of the season.
Game 2:
The Phils showed us a little bit more small ball here, failing to hit a home run but scoring 9 runs in the process. With Ryan Howard our only legitimate power threat in the lineup (sorry, Raul), this is something that we will probably need to get used to doing. Meanwhile, hopefully we as fans can get used to Cliff Lee's dominance that he showed again Saturday night.
Game 3:
The most exciting part of our first home run of the season? It was a 3-run home run, not the solo shots that Howard and the rest of the roster have gotten so used to over the past few years. We got men on base, and then we drove them in. It's a beautiful thing to see, especially when Roy Oswalt pitches a solid 6 innings and gets us in a great position to finish off a sweep.
If you had told me coming into this series that we would give up 4, 4, and 3 runs, I would put money on (if I were a gambler...) the fact that the Phillies would lose at least one of those games. To me it would sound like solid outings from our starters with little run support and a few extra runs given up by our bullpen. I know this is only the first series of the season, but it looks great having our pitchers and hitters working together to get us wins. Too often in the past we have had just the offense or just the pitching doing their best while their counterparts slept.
Looking very quickly at how people have been doing so far, a few things jump out: Polanco hitting .417, Rollins hitting .500, Howard hitting .538. Obviously those numbers will not continue for 6 more months, but we need them to be consistently hitting if we want to be consistently winning. Like we all know, the pitching is not something we will really need to worry about as long as they are healthy. We will, however, need to keep tabs on how well the top of our lineup is producing. So far, so good.
One thing that scares me: How do we not have a shutout yet?! I thought these pitchers were all supposed to be Cy Young winners/contenders. So much for that. Let's go, guys. Season started now, let's get with the program.
(If you didn't pick up the sarcasm there, it's because I'm dead serious)
(Just kidding)
(But seriously)
Reminder: If you have any comments or questions, feel free to leave them as a comment on this post or you can email me at cskoehler5@gmail.com. I'd love to hear from all of you!

Season Preview

Of the 45 baseball "experts" on ESPN.com, 27 of them have our beloved Phillies going to the World Series. It seems that everyone who has ever heard of baseball believes that the Phils are going to be matched up against the Red Sox in the 2011 World Series. As much as I would love to see the Phils back in the Fall Classic, I think we should first take a good look at how realistic that is.

I'm going to start out being extra negative. This way, we can all feel a lot better about ourselves by the time I get to the end of this. We'll go with a "The Good, the Bad, and the Ugly" theme on this, but it's going to happen in reverse. Although "The Ugly, the Bad, and the Good" most certainly does not have the same ring to it.

The Ugley:

Did I just spell "ugly" wrong? Or does the current status of Baseball's knee bother me that much? I'm gonna go with the latter on this one. The best news I've heard about Chase's knee is that he's starting the season on the 15-day DL, suggesting that he may only be out 15 days. The worst news I've heard is that he could miss the whole season. Will either one of those things happen? My guess is no. But I definitely think we are looking at a solid month at the very least, and maybe through the All Star break. What is so ugly about this? Besides the obvious (WE WON'T HAVE CHASE UTLEY), this puts Ryan Howard in a terrible situation, and, thus, our entire lineup really. Howard has had the luxury his entire career of having Utley get on base in front of him and having Jayson Werth or Pat Burrell protect him from the 5th spot. This year, he'll have 74-year-old Raul Ibanez hitting behind him. Without the threat of Utley or Werth, Howard will be stranded on an island in the middle of our batting order. Can he produce like he has in the past? Doubtful. Will his on-base percentage be at an all-time high? I would think. If I'm playing the Phillies, I never give him a pitch to hit. Expect to see the Big Man walking to first A LOT this season.

The Bad:

The bullpen. What was definitely our biggest need going into the offseason got completely ignored (well, not completely, if you consider the fact that our top 4 starters will pitch 7-9 innings every outing). Madson, Contreras, and Lidge were great last season, but Lidge is hurt (aka Lidge is on the Phillies), and we don't know how long that injury or its effects will last. In the meantime, no one else knows how to close. Yikes

Anything on our team starting with "right." Right-handed hitters are a thing of the past in Philadelphia, and our rightfielder is still a mystery (mostly because I don't want to admit that Ben Francisco is an everyday player in the major leagues). We do not have a single right-handed bat in our lineup that could be considered even somewhat of a power threat. And with Domonic Brown out with a broken hand to start the season, we lose that potential power in favor of Joe Camel. I am hoping that John Mayberry gets some nice playing time at the beginning of the year, if for no other reason than to simply see if his father can be properly identified in the stands. And not just call any random person his dad just because said guy was black and happy after John's first career home run. (Fox sucks. And so does Joe Buck)

The Good:

Cole Hamels is our 4th starter.

Let's recap that last statement.

Cole Hamels (yes, Cole Hamels) is our 4th (as in not the best, 2nd best, or 3rd best) starter. What does this mean? We have 3 pitchers who are better than Cole Hamels. (than Cole Hamels!) The Braves' 4th starter is Jrrr Jrrrjrrjrrrs (or however you spell/pronounce his name). Not bad, but not Cole Hamels. The Yankees' is Freddy Garcia. Not bad, but still not Cole Hamels. Cole legitimately should have won the 2008 Cy Young had he been given any run support. And he is our 4th starter.

With all of that being said, here is my impression on the upcoming season. We don't get the 96.5 wins that Vegas is putting us at, mostly because we don't have much of an offense. That sounds crazy, but it's pretty true if you look at the last few seasons. We should win any game in which we score 4 runs, but I truly worry about us scoring 4 runs this season. We should win the NL East, but the Braves are definitely going to be tough. We should win the NL this season, but it's going to come down to our hitting in October, something we couldn't do last season. With what some people believe is our best team of the past 5 seasons, I somehow feel the least confident with this group. Pitching will get us very far, but I know that the bats will need to be alive in order for us to be truly successful.

So here are 7 predictions for the season. Why 7? Because I feel like it. That's why.

1. Joe Blanton will get 15 wins this season. At least to start the season, he should be facing the worst pitcher on the other team. And don't you kind of get the feeling that he'll be the only one that the bats decide to hit for?


2. Roy Oswalt will have the lowest ERA on the team. Just because I feel like no one is talking about him. Halladay won the Cy Young, everyone loves Cliff, and Cole is a lifetime Phillie.


3. Michael Martinez will become our everyday 2nd baseman. Until Chase is back, I feel like this guy that no one has ever heard of could randomly start turning some heads. I love Rule V guys, and he's just that. And I think names like Michael Martinez are hilarious. He's from the Dominican Republic. Why not name your kid Miguel?


4. Rollins will hit .300. He's never done it before, and this feels like a year where someone will need to step up big on offense in the absence of Chase and Werth. Jimmy should feel like that's on him.


5. John Mayberry will hit 15 home runs. Mostly because I wanted him to last year.


6. Ryan Howard will win a Gold Glove. If for no other reason, because I'll look like a freakin' genius if this happens.


7. The Phillies will beat the White Sox in a 7-game World Series. I don't want to pick the Red Sox, so why not pick their arch nemesis to get there instead. And although I am skeptical about our offense, I can't honestly pick against us.

Third Time's a Charm

I know what you're all thinking right now

"Really? You're trying this again? Have you learned nothing over the past 2 years? You couldn't keep a blog going for the entire season if your life depended on it! You can barely go half the season! You truly suck at this. Why even try? What is your deal? Get a job dude!"

Well, first of all, that's a little harsh. So back off. And I have a job, so why even make a comment like that?

Beyond those things, I can see your point. I think that I have a legitimate shot at it this season, though. Just hear me out on this one.

In the past, I've had too high of expectations for myself. "Come on, Cameron (cause I don't call myself 'Cam'...that's weird) you can totally do this. All it takes is typing up your thoughts after every game or 2. You probably wouldn't shut up about this stuff anyway, so you might as well type it." Well this year I've learned that I need a real plan. So here it is. (And yes, I am totally making this stuff up on the spot. So yes, it may completely backfire and not work at all)

• I am going to write a preview for each series that we have as well as a recap of each series that we have. Unless there is something I really need to say, there is no need to try to blog for almost every game.


• I will use off-days to blog about broader topics, not just individual games. It was always tough to fit in those generic posts in the past while also trying to comment on games.


• I will encourage more participation from my readers to give me things to say. Only this year, I hope you'd be willing to email me as well as comment on the posts. I know some of you may get too nervous to have your comment seen by all, and I think it's adorable how shy you are. But don't worry, just email me at cskoehler5@gmail.com, and no one will have to know about it. You can comment on the Phils or an opponent, ask me questions that you would want answered in the blog or otherwise, give me suggestions for the blog, etc. The possibilities are endless! The more you talk to me, the better chance there is I actually keep this thing going. I'll be sure to keep reminding you.


• I have recently been reading the greatest blog known to man, and it has given me so many ideas for how I can make this one more interesting. Like no matter how many times you guys all email me, I will do some type of "mailbag" post about once a month answering your questions (or ones I make up that you "asked"). And I can have more links to things that are hilarious and/or awesome. Although this doesn't necessarily make my blogging easier, it definitely makes it more interesting for you. And it's really all about you, isn't it?


• I will again encourage guest blog entries. We had 2 last season, and I hope that more people will be excited to do it again this season. (I realize this could fall under the 3rd bullet point, but the more bullets the better... Well, not always.


• I'm not working at Summer Study this year! So although I loved it and will miss going back, it will allow me to fully focus on the Phils for the full season. (alliteration is awesome)

These are just a few of my ideas and plans. Hopefully you can stick with me for a 3rd attempt at this. I know that the past few years I've left you a little disappointed, even borderline depressed, but I promise to try my very best to make this year better.

I'm going to try to have a season preview up before the game on Friday. Let's go Phils!